Wow, what a week. I started back at uni doing two subjects. It was crazy, fun, hard, overwhelming. I sat in the first lecture and laughed with tears in my eyes. I’ve almost made it. I get out my stationary, hands still shaking from drugs and write my name and subject on the cover. So messy. I’m such a perfectionist. The room was packed full. Students were bringing chairs in left right and centre. I kept my head down avoiding eye contact with anyone. I wanted space on either side of me. I became overwhelmed, my tummy turned and I remembered that this is all in God’s plan. It came to the time where the lecturer asked us to talk to the person next to us. My immediate thought is “oh great, now i’m gonna have to introduce myself and tell the whole leukaemia story to some stranger.” We looked at each other and said hi. She asked me how long I’d been at uni for and I said it was a long story but that I missed last years classes because of leukaemia. It turns out she has a friend with it. She totally understood and didn’t ask further questions. It was amazing. I was so happy. A friend who understood. I walked her to her next class and we promised to sit together again.
I came home from uni on Monday with a purpose. A hope and a dream to keep moving forward no matter how long it takes and no matter how hard it is. My attention span isn’t strong, I find it difficult to read more than two pages at once, my brain goes fuzzy. My handwriting is messy. It’ll be years until I finish my degree. But I know in my heart that I am a conquerer. Sitting on His throne (Rev 3). I take day by day, putting my health first. Jesus is with me always. I can feel Him by my side. This is still hard but I have a vision for my future.